I was a good student until high school then I began to party, weed, speed and LS'D, etc. 3-1/2 years of nirvana. Its' never too late, I figured, and attended Community College after a less than successful stint at corporate office work for which I was overly compensated for doing essentially nothing for the second half of an 8 hour day. Life is a breeze, sort of, I thought. So were the classes at the local community college. I aced nearly every class, what me worry. U.C. Berkeley was next on my hit list of meaningless conquests. I wrote a well posed introductory letter and bingo, I'm in like Flynn. My parents were finally proud of me again. What the hell, so was I! First quarter, one class- 'read these ten novels and write an essay on each of not less than five million words', kidding, don't really remember, but I knew then that I was well and truly screwed. I could write well but not enough. A year of this was enough. Grants and food stamps had run out almost before I even took them for granted. Life had suddenly become very real. My parents, divorced, regarded me a failure. I became a security guard, a hot tar roofer, a short order cook, a machinist apprentice, a failure of all trades... I languished in a mountain top trailer park for several years unable to find any employment. Eventually, one meets people, I met someone in the construction trades. We built something together and he liked my work and referred me to someone else, etc, etc. 25 years later I find myself completely physically burned out- I have accumulated some where with-all but it could run out owing to the devaluation of all that is American of late. I'm comfortable but insecure, single, white and less than worthy of charity. I just can't seem to do this anymore- my body is literally too broken to continue and I'm no 'pussy'. So how's your life going?My life so far, how is your weird experience going?
My body isn't broken, but my spirit seems unwilling at times.
My tale:
Went to art school. Spent 25 years making a living at it. Makes me sick now. Boring. Did all I wanted to do in the field. I freelance now, but when I get jobs, I have to force myself to do them. I'm not exaggerating. If a deadline is Friday, I rarely start the job before Thursday.
So I am looking into other areas of interest.My life so far, how is your weird experience going?
lol. I'm 18 and I have learned how to do that already.. thanks for your help from the future. lol I'm fine thank you
Ok, my own story here. No where near as good as yours, but here goes...
I was the good son. Tried hard. Average grades throughout my high school years. We're talking C average my friend. Then onto college. College was obviously harder, but I was also more focused. My time was my own, so I could actually get something done without crazy parents or teachers bothering me. I graduated, B student. Not too bad. Next step. I wanted to be a hotshot stockbroker. Didn't everyone back in the BIG EIGHTIES? What do you know? They believed my BS. Hell, even I believed my BS. Landed a job with a prominent Wall Street firm. Stockbroker? You mean, telemarketer? I don't care who you work for, every major Wall Street company runs a boilerroom operation. Calls those people you don't know and try to sell them the latest greatest mutual funds that our overpaid, well-connected, fund mangers can mismanager. That lasted a few years...and then I was toast. Out the door. Not my decision, I was behind in the numbers they were expecting. I was 25 and mostly broke...having spent all of my earnings trying my best to look like a successful Wall Street somebody. From there I got into a sales job. I mostly loved it...because I was naive. I learned about how they treat successful salespeople, as I was becoming one. When you start to earn more money, they either cut the commissions, or they cut your territory. There's no way that those ego-infested sales managers are going to let a lowly salesman like me, even come close to earning what they were earning. Taking away the big accounts that I found. Somehow, I was promoted into a finance job. I guess they figured that since I was once a Wall Street hot shot...that I must be good with numbers. I was not...but I tried hard. I learned a lot there. Like the fact that people don't respect accountants. Just look at the financial mess we are in now. Did the accountants cause that? No. It was the hotshots that were dreaming-up ways to sell mortgages to people that can't afford them, then repackage those CMOs and sell them to investors...through my buddies at the brokerage firm, that were able to make their numbers. Now, here I sit. But, I am like you. My corporate daze was mostly unrewarding. People being friendlier to my face than they were behind my back. An 8 hour day at work, filled with 6 hours of meaningless interuptions, and 2 hours of something that might actually resemble work. In a given 40 hour work week, that usually meant about 8 to 10 hours of productive work that realy meant anything. But, people didn't notice. How could they notice? I thought I was a slacker...until I got a new computer at work...it was not new at all, but an older machine that another worker had been using that was merely a faster PC than the one I was using. Then I saw it. Yahoo Messenger. MSN Messenger. Ebay accounts. I mean, I was pretty bold and did some personal stuff at my job, but not half as bold as the folks that were on the clock and chatting with friends with their Instant Messenger programs on the company's time. Sadly, the world seems to be full of people that are not what they appear to be. It seems to be mostly smoke and mirrors. We are supposed to be in a new economy, where we are calling each other on the phone and trying to sell each other life insurance, stocks, dreams, something, anything...as long as it is manufactured somewhere else. The new economy. Where we produce nothing. But, how are the autoworkers in Detroit making $40 an hour supposed to compete with the people in Korea, making $40 a day? Or, the people in China, making $1 a day. Ok, but here's the thing. This too shall pass. I think everyone goes through this at some point in their lives. Perhaps a midlife crisis. Or, maybe we just woke-up from the Madison Avenue induced dream and we now suddenly realize that having that lastest iPod touch and really cool ringtones for our cell phones is not going to make us that much happier. Not that I am that impressed with electronic gadgets, but we all have our own personal neons gods that we worshipped and suddenly realized that they were not fulfilling.
Im onli 14:( turning 15 soon)
In preschool i didnt learn anything...then when I came into a smart elementary school in the 1st grade, I didn't know how to spell ';the'; in a warming up-spelling excersise....I also didn't know the days of the week and what order they were in. (It wasn't until like the second grade till i forced myself to learn, mostly cuz my friend was questioning me about what day it was and I was embarressed to tell her I didn't know, mostly I would say: ';ummmm i forgot';) anyway....
This friend...when I came into this new elementary school, I met her and we became friends and soon best friends, and we did a bunch of wierd things only little oblivious kids would do. She liked to boss me around and kind of parented me sometimes. Other than that life was good having a best friend......................then came the summer of 3rd grade....I was going to a daycare-thing over the summer where you would go on fun field-trips and hang out at the daycare with other elementary kids. So I met this other girl there, her name was Katy(not her name in real life) and we talked and she asked what elementary school i went to and i asked her, and I told her and she said that she was going to go to the elementary school that I was going to in the next upcoming school year, and I thought that was cool. So when the next year came Katy didn't know anyone so she decided to hang out with me and Heather(not the best friends real name in rl). In that grade, the fourth grade, I was spontaneous and fun, and I was in a different class than Katy and Heather and they were in a class together. Life was GREAT, I loved my teacher, I was popular, I had a crush who liked me back, (hehe) and I had a best friend and a soon-to-be best friend....what could go wrong?
It was I think the beginning of 5th grade...that the two friends kind of banded together and were best friends and pushed me out of their friendship. Things were going downhill...and every lunch I just went into the computer lab with an old acquantice of mine, Paula (lol again not rl name.) Me and Paula became best friends, we were both outsiders...pretty much, and I was insecure.
LIfe went on...and then near the end of the 5th grade Heather wanted to be my friend again. I was kind of hesitant because I knew thatthings wouldn't be the same...but I decided to give her another chance and we became ';friends'; again. It wasn't like our old friendship of course, kind of awkward at first, and was never real....no sleepovers, nutin like that. And that was all through the 6th grade. I hung out with Heather and Katy and some other girls, and was insecure still, but I was secure in my social life because I knew I wasn't a loner.
So 6th grade flew by, and I was shy and insecure.
7th grade:
At lunch I was hanging out with a big group of girls who had a high-ish ranking in school and heather and me and katy were in that group.
I knew already by now that Heather was kind of picking on me and being rude and mean to me. And I didn't like it...then things got totally wacked up one afternoon, and it was like halfway through 7th grade, and it was when Heather and Katy locked me out of H's house and makin fun of me and stuff and I was all distraught. When I eventually MADE it into the house I grabbed my bag and stuff and went out the front door and hurriedly and angrily walked. They didn't want me to leave cuz idk they didnt want her mom to know that I left her house, and I was walking to my house. It wasn't far away, just about 10-15 minutes walk away, and I didn't want to stay in that house anymore. So that was a big leap in 7th grade.
Second-half of 7th grade:
This time I ended up hanging out with my friend name Taylor (not rl name). I met her in the 6th grade and we were pretty good friends from then. I hung out with her group, and went on the bus with her to her house after school. We soon became best friends! I wasn't popular or anything, not even close, but I had good friends.
So life was good-ish and I think I was a B-average grade student.
Summer of 7th grade:
The bad part of this summer was that my new best friend Taylor was moving to Mexico and I probably wasn't ever going to see her again unless she traveled and visited. She was the only best friend I had left at that school, and I had already lost a lot of best friends.. (2)
I gave her my nintendo ds as I going away present because I knew I didn't play it that much, I knew she really wanted one, and I wanted to do a good deed. We also did a friend ritual-like sleepover thing before she left and we stayed up till 5:30 am in the morning.
8th Grade:
Here I hung out with Taylor's group. I didn't really know them that well but they were friendly to me, and I made good friends with most of them. None became best-friends like Taylor but they were a good group to hang with. (latina-nice-group) In the 8th grade it was a major change. I was consistent, and I got straight A+'s in all my classes. I did my
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