How do I get my husband to help out?

My hubby seems to be in the 1950's. I'm a stay-at-home mom to 3 sons and in my second trimester with our 4th child. He works regular 40 hr. week. I'm expected to clean up after the 2 dogs, the kids, and him. take care of house entirely, run errands,pay bills. If he does do anything to help (like mow the lawn, but doesn't use the weed wacker) he either acts like he's superman or more likely whines that his bak hurts cause he's 6'6'; and has to hunch over to hold the handle on the mower or his wrist hurts. Never does dishes cause that would make his back hurt and he works all day. I feel bad asking my 8 and 5 yr. old to do much cause they already help out more than my hubby. my 8 yr. old dries dishes for me and they both help watch over my 10 month old while I cook dinner. I don't have a dishwasher. I carry laundry up and down 2 flights of steps. He doesn't even throw away his own pop cans. His idea of playing w/ baby is putting baby on his lap, give him a toy %26amp; watch tv.How do I get my husband to help out?
You have three children and one on the way and a 6'6'; child as well.

Here's my solution that works wonders:

You need to gather everyone around to do a ';family meeting';

Then you need to go over a ';schedule'; of what everyone's responsibilities are.

...you could have each person responsible for collecting their laundry (5 %26amp; 8 year olds can do this)

...your husband can carry it down the stairs for you since you should not be doing heavy lifting very soon.

...one or two nights a week you are not responsible for meals. This means either dad cooks or you all go out.

...Start with getting a dishwasher installed.





Hubby needs to know what is expected of him and that he is to contribute to the house as well. Watching tv when he comes home is not parenting. Don't pick up his pop cans. He needs to set an example for the kids.



The way that he is acting now is going to impact how his children will treat and respect women in the future.



You two are creating the blueprint of how you want your children to interact with other people. You need to talk to your husband about this and if he is unwilling then you need to seek couple's counselling because it is then obvious that he is not respecting you and there lies a bigger issue.How do I get my husband to help out?
the best thing to do is to talk to him about it calmly but not while there is tension like when the two of you are getting along because guys respond better to this than asking when things are heated and both ppl are stressed out and another key to this is the way you say it. dont like accuse him of not helping just say it sweetly, like honey would you please do this for me? it would really help alot :) one of the most important factors of communication is how you do it ;) hope i have helped
Sounds like your considered more of a full time maid, baby-sitter and jack-of-all-trades than you are a wife, mother and best friend.



What you are married to is commonly referred to is a white trash loser. He may be a great guy, but his head-gear is not screwed on correctly. You need to unscrew the head-gear, purge all of the bad habits and retrain him to be respectfull and help out.



Solution? Stop what you are doing altogether, except for the minimum. The minimum includes taking car of the kids full time and devoting more time to them. Do just enough laundy to get him to work (leave his in the basement), but nothing else. Stop cleaning (let the toys and his soda can pile up). Stop having sex. Stop doing the dishes and let them just pile up (wash what you need to get by).



This will go one for a couple of days. Once he questions it, let him have it good (rant, rave, a couple of tears, and maybe break something of his you never liked. The frustration has piled up to a breaking point. He needs to see that when you vent.



After this is done, don't ask him to do things, TELL HIM to act his age and help out with his share, otherwise you will boycott all of the mutual chores.



Don't sell yourselve short. Being a stay-at-home mom is a full-time job in my book and this day and age. You work 18 hours a day without pay and few thank you's and many headaches. At the end of a hard day, he probably rewards you with sex in his mind?



Sorry, cut the loser off and set him straight. He sounds like a spitting image of his dad, and expects you to be his mommy.



If you do nothing to rectify the situation yourself, you have failed youself. What do you have to lose?

CAT lose WEIGHT