What is his problem? How to motivate him?

I've tried just about everything to motivate my husband to do a little maintenance or chores around the house.

He gets off work two hours earlier than I do.

When he gets home, he sits in a chair and usually falls to sleep.

I get home, cook dinner (while he sits,naps, reads), I clean up (while he watches television.

Weekends:

Saturdays: He gets up late, shuffles through magazines...while I'm cleaning house, doing laundry

Sundays: Same as Saturday, except, I'm doing groceries and finishing up laundry.

I had my brother fix the floppy screens on our back porch, front door is peeling, flower beds are dried dirt with weeds 1-2 ft tall, bushes need trimming?

I've tried ignoring it...hoping he'll do it on his time.

I've tried offereing him help doing it...he doesn't want to do it at that time.

I've nagged about it (this certainly DOESN'T work)

Any advice/recommendations?What is his problem? How to motivate him?
You've been letting him get away with it, even to the point of having your brother help out. Nagging won't help. I don't know if he's always been that way, or if he is depressed or...who knows? Just tell him that there are things that need to be done and if he is not willing to do them that you will have to take care of it yourself. If I were you I would go out there and start trimming the bushes, even if you don't really know how to or don't do a great job. Work on it, then come in and tell him that after doing that yard work, you're just too tired to cook dinner. Let him know what's in the fridge or w/e is easy for him to have to eat. Go take a shower, get yourself something to eat, and go to bed. You should ask to borrow one of his magazines before you head to bed.

You get what I'm saying. Do the work that he's supposed to be doing and let him figure out his own dinner, laundry, etc...

Make your point!What is his problem? How to motivate him?
Although it might irritate you, try and go a few days without cleaning the house to see what he does. Then if that doesn't help, I would divorce his butt! I'm sorry but I couldn't be married to a lazy bum like that.
Don't make dinner. Don't clean the house, dont do any work for a week. Tell him that you're just making it even and tell him if he wants it done he'll have to do it himself.



Just tell him what you typed here.
Oh Dear You Poor Girl! Try giving him incentives to things around the house, like tell him to come to the bedroom ,make him leave blushing-smiling-sweaty-know what I mean and then ask him for help if this doesnt work stop doing everything for him and only do it for you and see how he likes it for a day or two- then explain to him that jobs and household needs should be 50/50
In lieu of an answer, because I don't have one, I'd like to offer support. Exasperating as it is, know that you are not alone. I have many married friends who complain constantly about the same thing. Their husbands are lazy pieces of ****. I almost married one myself. I was smart enough to dump him, because I figured if I had to do all these things myself, and he was only going to sit there watching me do everything, I might as well get rid of the one thing causing me frustration about it. Him! Amazingly, I am much better off without a man in my life. Especially when I hear time and time again, these same complaints from women who married men who think their spouse should be mama, chef, maid, and sex kitten.



Good luck. I'll be watching to see if anyone has another solution.